In this blog assignment we had to write about a time where you had to make an important life choice. We have to incorporate showing and telling writing, to give readers an understanding of the story and how I felt about my situation. But before we could begin, it was necessary to watch a YouTube video called Reflective Writing. This video talks about the three stage process that involves looking back, analyzing, and projecting into the future. They mention the critical questions you should ask yourself while writing, what to avoid writing about, and the benefits you receive like a boost in self confidence. I will be responding to a handful of questions related to my writing process as well.
Who did you work with to compose your life-choice memoir? Was this a good approach? I was unsure of what to write about initially for this particular assignment. I haven't experienced many tough life choices, where I had to choose a certain path. But once I sorted through my memories, I picked a topic to write about. I talked to my Mom about the situation and she helped me gain some clarity. I also discussed it with my older sister and by doing that, she validated my feelings. She aided in the process of simply understanding, being supportive of my decision, and giving structure to my story. I feel as though this was a good and positive approach because my Mom played a role in my story, and my sister is the person I often open up to and feel most comfortable around. What rhetorical mode and genre are you using? The rhetorical mode for my life choice memoir is a narrative and the genre I am using is creative nonfiction. When did you write this project? Good approach? I began writing this project probably about a week after it was assigned to the class. I struggled with finding a situation that was "high stakes" or major. I debated between the story I chose to speak about and another one. But, since this is reflective writing I ended up going with the more personal narrative. I think it was a good approach because even though I didn't know what to write about from the beginning I bounced my ideas back and forth. I didn't settle until I was content with my topic, feelings, and understanding the entire circumstance. Where did you write this project? Good approach? I originally attempted to write this project in class, but I was having trouble trying to pick a real life situation that was difficult for me on a bigger scale. So, I ended up writing this project at home in my bedroom. I think it was a good approach, because I was comfortable when writing this story so when I needed to go into detail I found it was much easier. I could think clearly, and visualize the past and everything that took place. Why did you choose to write about your chosen topic? Good choice? I chose to write about this topic because it was difficult for me and other family members. I think it's also very relatable in the fact that relationships end all the time, whether we want them to or not. Sometimes it's in your best interest to terminate a relationship with someone, especially when you know it's unfixable and not in your control. I think it's a good choice because for me personally, it was a tough and long-drawn-out issue that I ignored and never spoke about. I also believe it was a good and healthy option because it assisted in me reflecting back on the situation, my emotions, and my overall decision. How did it feel to write this narrative ("during, after, and since")? Do you have any "if only" moments that can help you revise the draft? While I was writing this narrative it was strange and definitely not easy. I was experiencing frustration towards the person I spoke about and as a result, my fingers did not want to stay on the keyboard but my anger sure did. I would go from writing at a speed of zero words per minute, to nearly fifty words per minute. It was a constant back and forth battle. After I was finished writing I was satisfied to get my thoughts and inner perspective into the world, which I very often shelter. Ever since I wrote my narrative I think about it more, but not in a negative way. I tend to remember the situation, and it's unfortunate but I'm confident and at peace with my decision. As of now, I do not have any "if only" moments that can help revise my draft, but if any occur I will use them to improve my writing. How will you revise your narrative? I revised my narrative multiple times through my drafts, and by critiquing my own work. I used helpful tips that the YouTube video mentioned and explained, and I also took inspiration from everything we learned in class. *UPDATED* In class we were to share our life-choice memoirs out loud during our last two classes. When I was listening to their meaningful pieces of writing and they were expressing raw emotion, it changed my mind. I reverted back to my original story that I wrote, which I felt very strongly about. I'm glad we had the group readings because if we hadn't, I would have stuck to my story called No Prescription. It made me want to open up and share a story that I was hesitant about. I thoroughly enjoyed both of my stories, but I did come to the conclusion that my story In Bloom held a deeper meaning. If my classmates could share their personal truths, so could I.
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In this blog post I will be reading Hills Like White Elephants by Ernest Hemingway. It is a story that was published in 1927, based on a man and a girl dealing with a difficult reality. The girl I believe is pregnant with their child, and she’s hesitant to make a major life choice. The man who impregnated her tries to have control and the final say in whether they keep the child. I will be answering two questions, first I will give my opinion on if I think Jig (the girl) stays in a relationship with the man. Then I will be discussing a time where I stayed in a bad relationship, that I eventually left after two years.
Does she stay in her relationship with the man? I don’t think Jig stayed with the man for multiple reasons. Jig was hesitant and had doubts in her head about the abortion, and never reached a final decision. As she looks out at the trees, rivers, and mountains she has a realization that her fairytale life isn’t going to happen especially with this man. She speaks about how the world is no longer theirs regardless of the choice they make. She has a love for him, but she understands that this has an effect either way. The man speaks multiple times about how it's Jig's choice and that he won't force anything upon her. Yet as we read the beginning of the story he begins getting alcoholic beverages again and again. The man's actions spoke louder than his words, especially when he kept repeating that "it's perfectly simple" which reveals his ignorant and horrible mindset. Yes, she could keep the child, but she would be simultaneously dealing with the repercussions. He doesn’t care to have this baby and so that leaves the man miserable in their relationship. It also ruins any chance of them experiencing all life has to offer, since the focus will be on the baby. If she aborts the child, the man will be happy with her, but she will not be happy entirely with herself. She knows that guilt will lay heavy on her heart as she gets older, whereas the man will forget about it and move on with or without her. At the end when he returns she repeats herself twice by stating she’s fine. If you must repeat something twice, I feel as though you aren’t confident in your response. I think Jig is trying to convince herself she’s fine or maybe even put on an act, but deep down inside she’s hurting deeply and I believe she realizes the kind of relationship they share and the “man” he truly is. I won't speak for ALL females, but I am a female and will gladly voice my experiences. I've known that saying all too often, "I'm fine" when in reality I'm the complete opposite. I can certainly attest to the fact that I'm not the only one who has clung to that statement in hard times. In the story, the writer refers to him as "the man" never once giving him a name. He reminds me almost like the boogeyman, who also has no name making him not as relatable and the source of fear and uncomfortableness. The boogeyman, just like the man frightens people into good behavior and I believe he was attempting to accomplish the same goal. He would use his manipulative, controlling ways to point the girl in a direction of his choosing. He never once asked her how she's feeling or what kind of decision she wanted to make. I feel as though he was telling her sweet nothings, only carrying one agenda in his mind. Whereas, Jig is given a name making readers connect with her and feel emotions such as sympathy for her. If they were to have stayed together, I feel as though the writer would have given a name to the antagonist of the story but he chose not to. The man is a monster that possesses negative qualities, and seeks to hurt and conquer. But just like the Boogeyman, the man has no specific appearance leaving us to weed out them all on our own. When have you made an important choice to stay in a relationship or leave a relationship -- OR -- stay or leave a difficult situation? "I knew he was an unstable and spiteful individual, but when I felt the overwhelming sensation of steaming hot water fresh off the stove top splash onto my thighs, I felt my jaw drop from the amount of disrespect and utter shock." I made an important decision to leave a relationship in the beginning of 2016. I was in a relationship for about two years and tolerated way more disrespect than one should. It was my first serious relationship, and I entered it blindly and stayed since it became comfortable. After about a year, I noticed changes in his behavior and the way he outwardly treated me. He began distancing himself and becoming more aggressive and angry towards me. Towards the end there were days where I realized it was becoming more volatile, like the day he put a hole through my wall over absolutely nothing. I watched him angrily throw his giant fist into my brown wall as my eyes watched the drywall crumble and fall into my bedsheets and leave an everlasting imprint. As time went on, I could see his compassion fade and his horns become spears. I made the decision to go our separate ways for good, knowing this relationship was very toxic and unhealthy for myself. I gave him an extra laptop of mine to borrow and use for his schooling, so he didn’t have to pay for one. When I went to his house seeking to get what’s rightfully mine back, he yelled and continuously sucked his teeth at me. I knew he was an unstable and spiteful individual, but when I felt the overwhelming sensation of steaming hot water fresh off the stove top splash onto my thighs, I felt my jaw drop from the amount of disrespect and utter shock. He happened to be cooking pasta and his anger provoked him to dump the entire bowl on me. I left that night knowing I was leaving no matter how hurt and confused I was at the time. I felt as though this brief story matters, because throughout life many females will experience unfulfilling, unhappy, and even abusive relationships whether they realize during or after. But what's most important is that we leave, no matter how attached we are or difficult it can be. When the smoke clears and you begin to reap the benefits, you will stop and wonder what took you so long but find comfort in your own pure bliss. This week I will be discussing a story called “What You Don’t Know” written by Lulu Wang about her own personal life and one major decision. She speaks on her family, and the elaborate plan they chose to make to keep someone ignorant. But that someone is not just anyone, it’s her own grandmother who is unaware of her diagnosis with stage 4 lung cancer. In China the doctors give bad news to family members rather than directly to the patient, especially if they're older. Her great aunt who got the results believed it was best to keep it a secret for NaiNai's sake. Her family must come together to keep this secret under wraps, despite Lulu’s conflicting feelings on being deceitful to NaiNai, her grandmother. They throw a "wedding banquet" for one of her family members when in actuality it is a goodbye party. We learn about her late grandfather Yeye, and how resilient NaiNai truly is. I will be then talking about my opinion and if I agree with the family’s choice to be dishonest. Finally, I will be revealing a story about when I had to make an important choice to tell someone a difficult truth.
Did you agree with the family's choice to deceive Wang's grandmother? I did not agree with the family’s choice to deceive Wang’s grandmother. NaiNai’s sister, her great aunt spoke of her belief in that mental and emotional health was linked to physical health which I agreed with. I also understood her worry of her sister feeling fear and becoming depressed. She was concerned that she would stop eating and sleeping, but more importantly lose interest in her own life. So, I can sympathize and fathom why they made the choice they did. But, I strongly believe everyone should be aware of any life-threatening illnesses that have to do with themselves. At the “wedding banquet” Lulu asks NaiNai’s niece Gugu "what if Nainai has things she wants to take care of?" "Like what," Gugu responded. I said, "I don't know. None of us do. That's my whole point." "No," Gugu said. She doesn't have anything like that. And that was the end of the discussion. This very short conversation they had holds so much importance and I shared the same question in my mind, as did Lulu. Later, Lulu found out that her grandfather Yeye who died of liver cancer also was ignorant to his sickness until the end. Three days after he succumbed to the cancer. Her father said that Yeye knew deep down, because sick people know when they’re dying. So, was lying to NaiNai really going to prolong her life, if she too knew of her illness? But at the peak of it all we learn from her great aunt that in 2007, six years before the lung cancer diagnosis, Nainai had been diagnosed with breast cancer. She wasn’t aware of that at all and neither was her dad or uncle. She had a mastectomy, and she'd been wearing a prosthetic breast for nine years. Nainai concealed this from our family and uncle's family not because she was ashamed, but so that we wouldn't worry. All this time that the family was lying to protect her, she had also put on a show to protect them. Turns out that NaiNai is a strong elderly woman that can handle much more than her own family. She’s been burdening a secret to spare her family of heartbreak, while she’s already been sick for six years. Her family doubted her ability of being able to cope with such a diagnosis, when she had already faced a strenuous battle with breast cancer and being alone through that entire journey. That worry of NaiNai losing interest to her life, wasn't going to be the case. She attended the "wedding banquet" and showed an abundance of interest in discussing Lulu's future. Lulu mentioned "while I struggled with the grief of saying goodbye, Nainai focused on the future, a future she assumed she'd be part of. When you get married, she told me, I'll have an even bigger wedding banquet for you. She also asked when I'd have a baby, saying that she was looking forward to holding my child." I believe Lulu Wang’s grandmother should have been told of her test results, because she was capable of hearing such news. Her will to live was much stronger than any diagnosis. Lulu told us how she would get sick to her stomach when she would engage with her NaiNai and feed her lies knowing the truth. In the end it worked out, she overcame breast cancer and I don’t believe it made a difference. Three years later she’s still alive and each family members have their own theories on what saved NaiNai. Although I agree with the Chinese belief called chongxi which means that you can wash away a misfortune with joy, I still stand strong in my own belief that they should have been honest with NaiNai. When have you made an important choice to tell someone a difficult truth or you made an important choice to tell a lie that had a major impact on you and/or someone else? I had an important choice to tell someone a difficult truth, which was also to my grandmother. She always comes over for dinners since she’s getting older and lives alone. She often forgets stories, conversations, etc. that we have with her so on occasion she will ask questions we have already told her the answer to. So, when my brother got arrested and was going to be spending a year in jail for a DUI I was unsure if I should tell her. My mom did not like to discuss it because it made her emotional and I was worried that my grandmother would forget and end up repeating the question a lot in front of my mom. I did not want to put anymore weight on the situation. So, I waited, and my grandmother would ask where my brother was and why he hasn’t been around to see her. After multiple encounters of her asking me, I finally told her the news. It was difficult, but it was also uncomfortable and sad to not speak up and keep her ignorant to the matter when she obviously deserved to know. I told her that he will be in jail until the summer and she was very shocked and upset by the situation however we talked it out and I know she appreciated being aware of his situation. She hasn’t asked that question since, and I feel like everyone benefited from a difficult truth that had to be said and acknowledged. In this blog post, I will be reading a short story called "My Name is Margaret" by Maya Angelou. This short story takes place in 1928 when she is a maid. She is one of two servants to Mrs. Cullinan who is a wealthy and racist white woman. Mrs. Cullinan repeatedly offends Margaret, and tries to shorten her name to Mary. Margaret got wind of the news, that Mrs. Cullinan had also shortened Miss. Glory's name and that her real name is Hallelujah. The blatant disrespect wasn't going to last, and if Miss Glory (the second servant) wasn't going to take a stand then she would. Margaret takes matters into her own hands, and their relationship takes a turn when Margaret breaks Mrs. Cullinan's china that belonged to her mother in Virginia. I will be responding to a few questions related to the short story and my own personal experience.
Did you agree with Margaret's choice to break the casserole dish and two green glass cups? I agree with Margaret's choice to break the casserole dish and two green glass cups. The reason I agree is because imagine working really hard for someone, when you know your job is already degrading. Then, on top of that you receive even more disrespect when the person giving the orders decides to shorten your name for their own convenience. Mrs. Cullinan's rich friends came over and gave her the idea stating “Well, that may be, but the name’s too long. I’d never bother myself. I’d call her Mary if I was you.” Mrs. Cullinan began referring to Margaret as Mary. If that woman can't be bothered to pronounce your name correctly, why should anyone be bothered to wait on such an individual? That china was important to Mrs. Cullinan, exactly how Margaret felt about her own name. Mrs. Cullinan kept scratching away at Margaret's self-worth, so she hit her breaking point and decided it was time to take action into her own hands and demand respect. The dish and cups symbolizes Mrs. Cullinan's wealthy and entitled character. So, Margaret let them fall on the floor as her way of holding onto her self-worth and letting her know this ends here. If something is bothering you, let it be known. Do not suffer in silence and fall victim to someone's cruel actions or words. Mrs. Cullinan said, “Her name’s Margaret, goddam it, her name’s Margaret.” I can only applaud the outcome, Margaret's name is not Mary and she made sure it was known and acknowledged. Margaret left with her head held high, as she opened the front door to let the neighbors hear. She had the courage to fight back, something Miss. Glory never did. When have you made an important choice to either resist or not resist oppression, challenge the status quo, or refuse to obey an authority figure? I refused to obey an authority figure when I was young and impressionable. I spent some time with a girl who was older than me. I vaguely remember, but it was in the middle of the winter. We had nothing to do, and she brought up the idea to throw snowballs at cars. I only threw one snowball, and of course that was the one that hit someone's car door and I immediately knew I was in trouble. I ended up going to court for it, and the older women who worked there and reviewed my case had a preconceived idea of me and did not like me. They talked to me very harshly and were incredibly judgmental, and my mom even noticed it. It was glaringly obvious they didn't care if I was young, they didn't see it as a mistake. I had a task to complete, whatever it was, I knew I wasn't going to do it. The way they handled themselves and the situation wasn't how it should have played out. So, I did not complete the task they had asked, and I had to pay a fine as my consequence. But, in my eyes it was better than accommodating them after they chewed me out and tried to paint me in a bad light. |
AuthorHi, I'm Rebecca Stevens and this is my blog for my English Composition I class! Through my blog posts, I hope to show you bits and pieces of my life and character. Archives
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